What It's Really Like To Re-Enter by Curtis Hampton
Well in coming back to America I was a bit skeptical of exactly how things would feel and how I would react to my own culture. I've heard terrible stories about people having awfully hard adjustments back into American culture after being away from it for a significant period of time. Acutally for two years I've heard these terrible stories with just about no stories on the other of the spectrum to bring some positivity into going home. So me being the hard headed, go against the current kind of rebel that I am, I've been mentally opposing this concept for two years. I actually made claims out loud to a few people that I wanted to come back to America and prove that the transition from overseas life could be smooth. Well as always because I had set out to work against someone else's paradigm in a snotty way, I've learned a huge lesson in just trusting the wisdom of those who have gone before me. I did experience a low level of stress when I arrived here but I can honestly say that it was because I was afraid to engage with anyone because of these stories that I had heard. I was afraid if I started talking about where I'd been people wouldn't be able to identify with me and they wouldn't understand the joys and sorrows that I'd lived through over the past two years. Then I remembered, "duh, of course they can't indentify with what I've seen because they have not seen it." So then when that reality kicked in I began to relax and tapered my expectation of what engaging with people on stateside was supposed to look like. It really took the edge off and it allowed me to be open to different ways wanted to engage me for the first time in a long. For me, understanding that I and the people I'm coming home to have changed at differing levels and rates. That is so key to keep that in mind during this process. Other wise, of course I could find myself wondering why no one wants to listen to the music I brought back with me or why people don't enjoy the crazy teas I brought back.
Once I actually began to see people and interact with old friends I found that they received me so well and they were actually very interested in what my experience was like. They were interested on a deep level and a not so deep level. I've gotten to tell lots of stories about what our Father is doing where I just came from and I've gotten to talk about eating dog meat too. It's been a good balance for me so far. There have been some weird moments also. I've noticed that somehow I've come back a little more intraverted than I left. I still love to be around people but not large groups of people. It seems a little pointless to me because being with a large group does not allow me to engage with people one on one, which I love most. So that's been weird and actually the first day I went back to church in my hometown it was a pretty uncomfortable feeling because I felt like these people were really excited to see me and they were doing a great job of expressing how much they missed me and are glad that I'm back. However, I didn't feel like my excitement matched theirs. So clearly there is a problem. I'd been looking forward to seeing several of my friends for months now and now that I was face to face with them it didn't feel like I expected it to feel. So for the next week I was really burdened by this. What I came up with was somehow I can't handle intense mass reunions anymore. Where I used to love a crowd, I really don't anymore. Thats not to say that I don't like being with people. I just need to have different limits than before. So that's been a very interesting change in me that I've experienced. Outside of that I can honestly say that this whole transition thing has been pretty smooth and effortless. So as I was ready to submit to the school of thought that transitioning back into America really is terrible, my reality was what I had hoped it would be. The loving, considerate community that I left is still here to receive me and help me re-adjust to climate, concerns, cuisine and everything else. I'm so blessed!!!!!
Once I actually began to see people and interact with old friends I found that they received me so well and they were actually very interested in what my experience was like. They were interested on a deep level and a not so deep level. I've gotten to tell lots of stories about what our Father is doing where I just came from and I've gotten to talk about eating dog meat too. It's been a good balance for me so far. There have been some weird moments also. I've noticed that somehow I've come back a little more intraverted than I left. I still love to be around people but not large groups of people. It seems a little pointless to me because being with a large group does not allow me to engage with people one on one, which I love most. So that's been weird and actually the first day I went back to church in my hometown it was a pretty uncomfortable feeling because I felt like these people were really excited to see me and they were doing a great job of expressing how much they missed me and are glad that I'm back. However, I didn't feel like my excitement matched theirs. So clearly there is a problem. I'd been looking forward to seeing several of my friends for months now and now that I was face to face with them it didn't feel like I expected it to feel. So for the next week I was really burdened by this. What I came up with was somehow I can't handle intense mass reunions anymore. Where I used to love a crowd, I really don't anymore. Thats not to say that I don't like being with people. I just need to have different limits than before. So that's been a very interesting change in me that I've experienced. Outside of that I can honestly say that this whole transition thing has been pretty smooth and effortless. So as I was ready to submit to the school of thought that transitioning back into America really is terrible, my reality was what I had hoped it would be. The loving, considerate community that I left is still here to receive me and help me re-adjust to climate, concerns, cuisine and everything else. I'm so blessed!!!!!